La vallée du mystère (1967) Online

An incredible cast, some fabulous locating footage, and even a few good action sequences don't hide the fact that this T.V. movie /alleged pilot is far worse than any of the Universal camp films that they did with Maria Montez back in the 1940's. As far as airplane disaster movies go, it's even worse than 1961's "The Crowded Sky", which up until this point only barely surpassed "The Concorde: Airport '79" as the worse, and now those two go up several notches thanks to this one. Film posters indicate that it was released theatrically somewhere, and outside a drive-in theater where teens didn't go to watch the movie anywhere, it's the type of film that can insight riots with its insipidness. Cardboard cutout characters, ridiculous situations and plot twists and far too many cliches and subplots make this an absolute eye roller.

Actually, if you can replace all the bad qualities about this and just look at this for the silliness of the whole thing, you might actually enjoy it for its absurdity. First of all, "Airplane's" Peter Graves is one of the passengers aboard, a novel writer heading to the Congo who interests perky but dumb Lois Nettleton with stories of his adventures. Prim and proper school teacher Julie Adams becomes the focus of psychopathic killer Fernando Lamas, stalking her like a cheetah with the intent of making her his mate as he intends to escape from capture and return to his own country. He has already attempted to take over the identity of the bounty hunter taking him back to Argentina after their plane crashes in the jungle, then after committing another nefarious crime, uses Adams in his efforts to escape. His character has absolutely no charm, unlike other bad guys Lamas had played, so every moment he is on screen is simply just vile. Poor Adams must not only deal with a lecherous passenger sitting next to her, but Lamas as well, so I hope that later on when Adams was reunited with co-star Richard Egan (the pilot here) on the soap "Capitol", they had a good laugh over this.

Another wretched major part of the plot has Graves and Nettleton out in the jungle searching for Graves' sister and coming across Graves' old acquaintance, alleged missionary Alfred Ryder, whose involvement with natives has stirred up wars between various tribes. Nettleton, who had previously dealt with quicksand (after oohing and ah'ing over a cute monkey), is cast as one of those stupid helpless broads that threatens to get her leading man into more trouble just because of her recklessness. To add in more cliches to their sequence, they rescue a very friendly native boy, whom had this been a 1940's Universal film, would have obviously been cast with Sabu. It appears that somebody at Universal TV had seen those Maria Montez/Jon Hall/Sabu movies one too many times and felt that they needed an update, and also threw in a bit of RKO's "Five Came Back" and its remake, "Back From Eternity". The rest of the cast is pretty much wasted in their thankless parts, and by the time this is over, you may just feel wasted, too. This makes the same year's "Valley of the Dolls" seem like a masterpiece in comparison.

A jetliner with 130 souls on board crashes in the jungles of Venezuela, so far off its flight plan that no one is ever likely to find the survivors. They must shift for themselves. It's an old premise that can still work given the proper treatment but this made-for-TV movie -- originally a pilot for a projected series -- is so tired and lifeless that it can't even qualify as "fun." Those with nothing better to do can watch a cast of left-overs and washed-ups and might-have-beens traipse around an utterly unconvincing jungle, engaging in the hokiest of subplots and back-stories, but even this barely-better-than-nothing activity quickly wears thin. Richard Egan plays the flight's captain but if you're hoping to see him take his shirt off, you will be disappointed. Even in the jungle, his uniform shirt remains white, crisp, tidy, and buttoned up.

This is a pretty standard jungle movie, with the obligatory quicksand scene, complete with don't-struggle-you'll-only-sink-faster cliché; I was waiting for Tarzan to turn up at any m minute! It was Lois Nettleton I felt sorry for; in her almost 60-year career (her last appearance as far as I can find out was in an episode of "Murder She Wrote") she was always remembered as the girl who fell in the quicksand within minutes of surviving a crash landing.It overshadowed her entire subsequent career. Attack Of The Killer Compost Heap!