Pomeriggio caldo (1989) Online

Bizarre Voodoo Ritual (1987)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Also known as POMERIGGIO CALDO, HOT AFTERNOON and 11 DAYS 11 NIGHTS 3, this D'Amato low-budget flick doesn't have too much going for it except for some real badness that makes it mildly entertaining. A reporter (Allen Cort) takes his kinky girlfriend (Valentine Derny) to New Orleans where they're going to do a story with a woman (Carey Sally) whose husband was killed in some sort of voodoo ritual. Soon the girlfriend takes off with another man leaving our reporter depressed and just standing outside their window watching them have sex. This is yet another D'Amato softcore effort and it's got some really horrid dialogue and awful performances but these are two reason to actually watch the film. I must admit that I found all three leads to be very bad with their performances and not for a second did I buy any of them in their roles. Cort gets to scream some of the lamest dialogue in film history (If you want to f*** him for now that's fine. When you're done, remember where I am) but his delivery is just as funny. Not for a second did I believe him to be a reporter and I'd have a hard time believing he could actually spell his name. Derny certainly fits her sexual part but her acting still leaves a lot to be desired. The movie actually does do a pretty good job at balancing the "story" with all the nudity and sex. D'Amato uses the New Orleans settings to his advantage and the music score isn't too bad at all. The sex scenes themselves are pretty bad as you'll be feeling more laughs than any type of erotic nature. Fans of the director will probably want to check this out even though the subject of sex and voodoo had been used by him in his early 80s period with films like EROTIC NIGHTS OF THE LIVING DEAD and the horrible PORNO HOLOCAUST.

Cashing in on whatever cinematic trend happened to be hot at the time, the late Joe D'Amato (né Aristide Massaccesi) has dabbled in genres as diverse as sword and sorcery (ATOR, THE FIGHTING EAGLE), post-apocalyptic science fiction warfare (ENDGAME) and even martial arts chop-socky (1973's cross-pollination hybrid PUGNI, PIRATI E KARATE). Of course, he remains primarily enshrined in memories of trash flick aficionados across the world for balls to the wall bloodletting and acres of bare skin, sometimes found within the same project, if you're lucky, such as his EROTIC NIGHTS OF THE LIVING DEAD ! In an attempt to corner the cable market of the '80s, with after dark transmissions of naughty numbers (preferably of European extraction) serving very much as the whole phenomenon's bread and butter, Joe inadvertently struck gold with the "original" 11 DAYS 11 NIGHTS, a thinly veiled 9 AND A HALF WEEKS rip-off. As a result, several similar if unrelated soft-core sagas of his were packaged as sequels for the home viewing audience. Henceforth, BIZARRE VOODOO RITUALS - initially released under the far more generic moniker of HOT AFTERNOON - doubles as the third installment in a series that would eventually grow to comprise a whopping seven episodes.

Albeit a botched effort by and large, the movie's not entirely without merit as it introduced a wanking world to the strikingly angular features and perfect hourglass figure of Valentine Demy who was to become one of the more radiant latter-day lust goddesses whose simulated exploits still graced cinema screens in those few remaining countries abstaining from full color penetration, by law if not by choice. Providing memorable support in Tinto Brass's PAPRIKA and SNACK BAR BUDAPEST, she ultimately caved to commercial pressure and went hardcore with Alessandro "Alex Perry" Perrella's 1992 showcase VALENTINA VALENTINA, receiving porno pointers from such stalwarts as Rocco Siffredi and Luana Borgia. As Connie, the remarkably passive "heroine" of a narrative where no one does much of anything, she delivers one of the film's less embarrassing performances. She's matched by Allen Cort, whose only additional credit seems to be the forgettable JAWS rip-off DEEP BLOOD (finished by Joe when original director Raf Donato called it quits !), whose vanilla blandness playing her investigative journalist husband Courtney at least saves him from ridicule. Other cast members are not as fortunate. Never one to pass up a potential mainstream tie-in, Joe signed former model Carey Salley in the wake of her much-publicized break-up from Hollywood offspring Emilio Estevez for the pivotal part of reclusive authoress Nora Highway, conveniently overlooking the fact that she couldn't act to save her life. Nora's exhaustive knowledge of voodoo is instrumental in carrying Courtney and Connie (sounds like a comedy duo, doesn't it ?) to Cajun country for the adventure of a lifetime, but not really.

Although only married for a year, all's not well between these two, due in large part to Courtney's insistence on his spouse flashing beaver at unsuspecting passers-by, prompting the flick's funniest bit when they inadvertently repulse the gay waiter at a posh restaurant ! Seems like Connie's ripe for the pickin' and that's where mysterious Cajun love god Budro Richelet, incidentally also their new landlord, comes in. Stuck with an unplayable part, Robert LaBrosse attempts to save face by switching back and forth between two expressions, narcissistic smile or glowering menace. For his troubles, he found himself subsequently cast in a leading man capacity in any number of Joe's soft-core ditties like PASSION'S FLOWER, DEVIL IN THE FLESH or ANY TIME, ANY PLAY with an occasional walk-on in a "real" Hollywood high profile project like the Coen's MILLER'S CROSSING. Locking stares with Connie at what must surely qualify as the most tedious trance dance voodoo ceremony committed to film, featuring a fully dressed cameo from BLACK EMANUELLE herself Laura Gemser (immediately conjuring memories of movies far superior even at their lowest ebb), Budro's a surefire shoo-in to replace the colorless Courtney in his wife's affections. Cue a variety of uncharacteristically timid sex scenes with Demy at least adequately displayed and even Salley flashing a brief full frontal as she consoles the abandoned husband in the tub.

But what about the title, I hear you ask, where are those (drum roll) BIZARRE VOODOO RITUALS ??? Bearing in mind the movie was only tagged that way after the fact, Joe tries to enliven proceedings at the eleventh hour with the surprise revelation that Budro's knee-deep ensconced in a local voodoo cult and that Connie's at risk of becoming their latest though not exactly virgin sacrifice ! Nora tosses off this crucial piece of info to Courtney in a startlingly cavalier manner ("I probably shouldn't tell you this...") so he can leg it over to his rival's house just as the wife's being rubbed down with freshly slaughtered chicken blood and save the day. Don't cha just love a happy ending ? While not quite ANTHROPOPHAGOUS strength, the blood-spattered climax distinguishes itself from the rest of this dire flick by injecting some much-needed visual panache apart from Valentine's casually unclothed curves, incorporating a couple of attention-grabbing cinematic motifs right out of Alan Parker's ANGEL HEART. Doubling as "Federiko Slonisko" on camera duty, Joe actually fails to mine the lush Louisiana landscape for mood purposes, showing as little enthusiasm at the helm as he ever has. Idiot plot is credited to one enigmatic "David Resseguier" which might just be another Joe alias, although this begs the question why he would approach his own material with such a damning lack of interest. At least, there's a typically delirious skin flick score complete with heavy-breathing and barely intelligible theme song by Piero Montanari, posing as "Peter Mountain" on D'Amato's XXX efforts like SOME LIKE IT HARD and MIDNIGHT OBSESSION. Formerly respectable Rosanna Landi, who cut Fellini's AND THE SHIP SAILS ON before joining forces with Joe as "Kathleen Stratton", appears to have edited with a meat cleaver left over from the director's gorier salad days.