Flying: Confessions of a Free Woman Online

What does it mean to be free? Can you make a list of rights? Is freedom doing what you want without harming others? Or is it a feeling . . . ? Can you get it back? Filmmaker Jennifer Fox starts her six hour epic documentary with vague ideas and a determination to get on track. Her life is a mix of 'liberated' and 'fucked up'. She's successful in her job. She has a nice boyfriend. She's also doing long-term deep 'n' meaningful with a married guy. And yes, she's totally open with everyone about everything.

But Jennifer, forty-something and Jewish, has the advantage of living in a fairly 'free' society. When she starts exploring women's situations in other countries, her search for freedom takes on very different perspectives. Even as she goes through crises of miscarriage and conscience in her own life, her problems are dwarfed by women whose daily lives include rape, prostitution, female circumcision, sexual abuse and near slavery.

"Men talk about what they think; women talk about what they feel. That's the difference!" Confessions of a Free Woman is a film written in the language of feelings. A different language. The language of women. Fox gets involved with women who are in desperate circumstances. With women who are, or become, her friends. She treats all as equals. The shared emotions are a bridge of understanding for us as we watch spellbound.

The film's title perhaps evokes Erica Jong's famous novel, Fear of Flying. Both works address the complexity of relationships. Desire. Love. Dependence. And 'freedom.' But Fox is skin-flayingly autobiographical. When stuff hits the fan, it's real. And we experience it with her. Fox and Jong have used a common symbol of flying to evoke the sense of freedom. For Fox, it hearkens back to childhood. She would practice take-offs and landings with her father - who had a small two-seater plane. She idealises father as 'free'. As a man, he could do "anything he wanted." Jennifer follows in dad's footsteps in many ways, but then she hits a time in life where different perspectives are kicking in - with a harshness. Her best friend has a brain tumour. She herself doesn't know if she wants a child. And are her 'freedom-based' relationships really satisfying? 'Flying' evolves in a very female-orientated way. She has always been acutely aware of her gender in terms of freedom. Being/not being controlled by men. One of her main techniques is to 'pass the camera' during group conversations. She addresses problems women face in an archetypically female way – by talking about them, and sharing emotion. While it succeeds in this to an extent that is almost groundbreaking, the film will divide audiences equally.

Men may need to make a bigger jump to understand women in the way women do. Arguably, though, it is worth the effort. Women still don't have parity even in the West. In some countries, they are little better off than livestock. In purely scientific terms, this is a massive loss to humanity. A loss of potential. Even before we get on to human rights: by failing to appreciate the value of others, we devalue ourselves, whatever the gender. It just so happens that women have often got a very short straw. So there is a good case to suspend traditional judgement and let the film speak in its own language before finalising your opinion.

And here's why you may feel it is an effort. Fox is an accomplished filmmaker, but her marathon voice-over has the tone of someone talking to a child or young student. (Is it a mistake commonly made by women who have been patronised? To then patronise? – a vicious cycle, but one that was exploded by feminist philosopher Radcliffe Richards in the 90's). Secondly, her narcissistic self-analysis can be like Woody Allen without the comedy, Sex in the City without the glamour, or Ally McBeal without a decent script. It takes her six hours of film (and several years of her life) to see what friends and family can see in five minutes (She falls in love with the wrong people – duh! – I've done that too, but did you really want to know?). Thirdly, she argues from the particular to the general (the erroneous logic of, 'because this example is true, it must be true for all cases'). Such flawed, quasi-philosophical ruminations would be laughable were they not accompanied by so much anguish. Fox's grand exploration lacks any visible academic basis and it is tempting to believe she is a bit up herself. The most interesting part of the film, the lives of other women, is dealt with far too superficially. It is easy to see her as a wide-eyed American, flying in for a three-hour tour of the horrific Asian brothel, then telling us her amazing facts as if she was the first person to discover them.

But for all its many flaws, Flying – Confessions of a Free Woman, is a considered triumph of film-making. It stays with you the way trivial events shared with close friends stay with you. So even the flaws work. Jennifer Fox puts herself through ordeals on camera. She exposes her private life in a way few people could bear. Remarkably, she can be experiencing dire personal struggles yet still the professional in her captures it on film. Then we have (after equally impressive editing by Nils Pagh Andersen) a lengthy work that is asking you to spend the best part of a day to watch it. That is brave.

And this reviewer is grateful that he was convinced to do it.

Despite its awful title, this film had potential. I wanted to be able to like this doc and herald it as an important feminist work for opening the discussion between women of different cultures on what love and marriage means to them, but I'm so put off by Fox's seemingly willful ignorance about her own life that it negates the film's positives.

Fox is so self-obsessed and unwilling to admit her own role in the relationships she chooses and the realities of how most other relationships work that I find it nearly unbearable to watch. I think there's a way to eschew traditional relationship roles without being so selfish or purposefully oblivious that you can't sympathize with those who adhere more to traditional roles.

I mean, any single adult who enters into an ongoing sexual relationship with a married person and doesn't for a second think "what happens if we get discovered?" nor acknowledges in any way prior to being discovered that said discovery might be the catalyst in the demise of the adulterous relationship is a tad delusional.

And the whole "I don't get married because I've seen men do bad things and I don't want to get emotionally hurt" bent just seems so naive. What does marriage have to do with the capacity to be hurt emotionally? Obviously Fox was hurt by the fact that she couldn't talk to her lover after his wife discovered their sexual relationship. The only way to not open yourself up to being emotionally hurt by relationships is to not BE in any relationships, married or otherwise. Is that not common sense to liberal New York narcissists? Guess not.

Fox's annoying hubris is a shame, because if she could have just shut up about her own stupid life for a second, she might've had a good idea for a documentary—and it would have been a hell of a lot shorter than a tedious six hours. Instead we're presented with someone who proclaims her alleged freedom while showing us how miserable her decision to be "free" makes her. Um, hooray?

OH MY GOD - this woman needs to read the book HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU. She tries to convince us that she is a "free woman" by choice, but it is painfully obvious she is only a free woman because the men who deign to sleep with her don't want her for anything more than sex. She spends the ENTIRE series discussing these horrendous relationships, for which she is obsessed. And she is completely remorseless when her married "lover's" wife finds out about their relationship. And she completely ignores the obvious meaning when he not only doesn't leave his wife, but virtually cuts off all contact with her. She even misses the import of her Swiss boyfriend deciding to work all day when she comes to visit him in Switzerland. It's really sad. Instead of portraying strong womanhood, she is one of the worst examples of a female's obsession to be loved and accepted by men. When will these women realize they ARE NOT any better than the women who have chosen to be in asymmetrical relationships with men but do it in a way that makes them happy.

Jennifer Fox did what most women would cringe to do...she discussed (and sometimes showed) all the intimate details of her sex life and she did it very openly. Sometimes her company consisted of men and women who were not hip to her ways and she could have faced severe consequences. Flying is about every woman and no woman. Some of these women have been free to explore their sexuality while some don't even know what an orgasm is (even after marriage). Fox did a brave thing by addressing not only the sexuality issues women have globally, but the issues we have with our mothers, our fathers, our siblings, nieces, nephews, body image, pregnancy,divorce, and several other factors. To keep it this real, it can't always be pretty so from Le Dawn's divorce woes, to Mindy the soccer mom, you can't help but identify with at least someone in the film. If you have an open mind, better yet an open heart this will be a good film for you. Feminist or not.

So, after the film's subject drones for hours about various women's issues, I'm supposed to take her seriously as a woman of substance and a feminist. Give me a break.

What kind of feminist:

1. Gets involved in bad relationship after bad relationship without recognizing her own self-destructive behavior and poor choice in partners? 2. Has an affair with another woman's husband and (apparently) feels no remorse for destroying a marriage? 3. I may not have heard this correctly, so my apologies if I misunderstood, but did I hear her say she'd had multiple abortions? I'm pro-choice, but abortion isn't birth control, lady. If you want women to achieve true sexual liberation, you best start behaving like a woman worthy of it.

In my mind, Jennifer Fox is not a woman to admire and this film is nothing but a vehicle for her own neurosis and narcissism.

As a husband and father of two daughters, I shudder at the idea of women looking at Ms. Fox as a role model.

I caught this series of documentaries on TV by accident and it cost me a night's sleep; I was so intrigued that I couldn't stop watching.

The way in which Jennifer Fox explores her own sense of being a woman juxtaposed to the perspectives of women from all over the world on themselves is fascinating. It also seemed to me that Jennifer was very genuine in documenting her own life, including her own lapses of judgement from time to time (i.e. unprotected sex in an HIV infected country), and also her most dark moments and her happiest moments. This made the documentary very real and raw, and all the more educational. It also made the stories of the women around the world come to life more.

I thought it was beautiful how Jennifer's own quest for freedom and for motherhood, and her own struggle to find true love were contrasted to global women's issues such as female genital mutilation. Those who say that Jennifer's struggles are petty compared to the global issues and shouldn't have been shown in this way are entirely missing the point (in my not-so-humble opinion). If this was a scripted TV series - perhaps the point is valid. But this is someone's actual life we are seeing. These are the defining struggles in her womanhood and they absolutely compare to the global issues - as every woman's self-defining struggles do. There is nothing bigger than figuring out who you are, and then take action accordingly. One can see in this documentary that the more Jennifer begins to understand herself as a woman, the more she understands (and can identify with) the other women around the world. It's hugely important.

I also thought it was very interesting to see Jennifer's mother, aunt, father and grandmother and hear their perspectives on motherhood, marriage, sexuality etc. It made me think of my own parents' idea of me as a woman and how that has influenced my upbringing and how it still influences their dreams and expectations for my future.

All in all, I thought the 6 hours weren't enough. I would have gladly sat through another 6 (not all in the same night though!). This documentary made me reflect upon my own life and upon the lives of women all over the world. I'm also really curious to know how Jennifer's life developed, and also how all the other women are doing now. How is the young singer from the UK, for example? And has L'Dawn won her alimentation court battle yet?

Conclusion: well worth watching.

This film premiers July 4th-17th at the Film Forum in NYC. It is going to be an exciting and groundbreaking film that I'm sure will create quite a buzz. I've seen the film and was truly awestruck by its profundity and brave exploration of women all over the world. The filmmaker, Jennifer, bares her soul as she uses herself as a tool to address the issues that face women no matter their background or ethnicity. It is a film that all should see, male or female, to better understand the world around us and the strides that still need to be taken to ensure equality and peace. Besides, its political and societal significance, Flying: Confessions of a Free Women, is also a compelling and soap opera like film that, despite its length, flies by in a whirlwind of emotional drama and hilarity. Thank you to Jennifer Fox for giving so many different women a voice. This film is a must see!

I could only watch the first 1 hour. Jennifer Fox has made junior high school girls look smarter than her. Come on, 42 years old, living in New York and behaving like it's your first crush. In these films she is clueless, and comes off very immature and childish. However, there are a few of her friends, who I say bravo too, through illness and divorce they show great courage, however somehow the films doesn't portray bravery and courage, it documents how little women have grown. Jennifer narrates the film and it is totally about her failure at love, it is easy to understand why she is not successful. All this giggling and laughing... Come on, grow up. It is a disappointment to see a women who is obviously talented still obsessed about having a man. Her lover lives in Africa and is married... I think that is all you need to know. She spends the entire movie agonizing over this. She visits all her friends and most of them are just as clueless. I was astonished , in disbelief she actually produced this film and thought that it told a relevant story.

How do films like this get selected by film festivals? I seriously question the programmers who allow such a blatant waste of screen time. I am quite certain there are hundreds of films more deserving. I found "Flying" to be self-indulgent drivel, undeserving of an audience. As she travels the world exposing herself as an "ugly American," the filmmaker ignores cultural differences, choosing instead to apply American values to foreign situations. I wish particularly disturbed by the way she exploits her own family. Often contrived, always boring, director Jennifer Fox should have spared us this painful cinematic experience by staying home and continuing therapy.

I cannot help but feel filthy watching this film. Jennifer Fox is an altogether repulsive character. There are many films made centering on vile characters, but I never bought into her absurd belief system. She is the absolute nadir of humanity. Her life is pathetic and tragic. She spreads her ridiculous example to other pathetic wretches who actually believe that they represent enlightened, "modern women". The notion that she actually supports herself by teaching is abhorrent to me. Abortion was never meant to be used as birth control. Her body now spontaneously aborts each fetus...how ironic is this? Through this entire debacle, her answer to her dilemma is to advise her girlfriends to freeze their eggs. Moral choices have no place in her depraved world. People laud her for her honesty, but most people would be ashamed to divulge such reckless behavior. Feminist filth.

I watched this purported documentary mainly because it was being shown on Natasha Del Toro's America Reframed, a show which usually showcases worthwhile material. What kept me watching after the first five minutes of this woman's unforgivable, self-pitying, navel gazing was the hope of seeing Natasha Del Toro prick and drain the blister of stupidity that was this film.

Then I realized a few points that would have been glaring, flashing, red lights long before this piece of dead-air uselessness was ever compiled.

I realized that, if anyone had bothered to ask themselves the question "Would I, given an opportunity to decide whether I might want this woman to be, or have been, my mother, have opted instead for being aborted?" It's a germane question because, if you were genetically predisposed to be stable and sensible and perhaps even happy, this mother would screw you up before you had a chance to vocalize about it. If, on the other hand, you were genetically predisposed to be unstable, lacking good sense and miserable, she might foster a serial killer of whiny women.

Jennifer Fox makes it amply clear that she thinks she's the center of the universe and that everyone else should think so too. It's nice that, when no one else actually thinks that about her, she can simply concoct a never ending soap opera starring herself and hawk it to undiscerning PBS stations as a 'documentary' of her bourgeois woes, hangnails, and indecision.

The fact that Jennifer Fox is a perfectly humorless whiner may explain how it is that no man, or woman, can tolerate being around her long enough to give a rat's ass about her angst. Can you imagine what torture it would be to be waiting on her table at lunch - or to find out you're sharing the cabin of an airliner with her? Would you, absent a threat of great bodily harm, invite her to your house for dinner? This woman is simply boring and boorish in the extreme and that's what she invariably brings to the party. She's also the only person to whom this fact seems to be a mystery.

The saving grace in this vagina travelogue might be that the 'I'm a miserable person. Please take pity on me so I can film another relationship disaster, with you having fallen sucker for my act' look seems to have been permanently frozen on Fox's face. It just looks fake - especially in that scene in which her facial expression reflexively snaps to almost normal at the instant in which the ringing of the telephone interrupts Fox's bad acting.

Then again, now that I think about it, this 'project' is most likely a scam, a fraud from beginning to end, a perfectly concocted ruse to see just how gullible the film industry and its patsies could be. The obvious thing that screams fake is that no one could have these sorts of events occur without a carefully written sardonic plot. So maybe it's worth watching for the humor.

Oh my god! Is it possible that this entire series is one huge hoax and that no one wants to admit that they fell for it hook, line, and sinker? Now THAT would be funny. I await the news.